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Hiển thị các bài đăng có nhãn Tips for life. Hiển thị tất cả bài đăng

Life Lessons: Dealing With Grief

When a parent of an adult dies, some view it as a rite of passage.  Some feel that you should take that death in stride, handle loss in an adult manner.

What does that mean? Not be sad? Be grateful that Dad did not die when you were a child?
That would be under estimating grief.  Loss does not diminish because you are an adult or because your mother or father lived a long life.

Here’s what most people don’t understand: Whether our parents live near or far, are emotionally close or distant, they anchor us in the world. Even though we know they will die someday, most of us cannot a fathom a world without them. Can you imagine a world without a sky? Of course not. It has always been there. 

Often we lose a parent after a long illness, but sometimes the death is sudden. For some the call comes on an otherwise idle Thursday.  Out of the blue, our world turns upside down without warning. How can this be? Mom was fine, and now she is not. Dad was here, and now he is not.

Sudden death compounds the loss.  That’s because there is no preparation, no goodbye, just the loudest absence one could ever imagine.  As a result in sudden death, the denial will be longer and deeper.  The more sudden the death, the longer it may take to grieve the loss.

Give yourself that time.

Our society places enormous pressure on us to get over loss.  But how long do you grieve for your mother of 40 or more years?

The answer is simple: You grieve for as long as you need to.

Essay by David Kessler. AARP: The Magazine, June/July 2015


Website story, Guidelines for a Good Life

This was developed by Professor Linda Fujkawa at Kapiolani Community College in Honolulu, Hawaii for sharing with her students and friends.
Honesty and frankness (meaning: directness) make you vulnerable(meaning: open to criticism).
                Be honest and frank anyway.
The biggest men and women with the biggest ideas can be shot down by the smallest men and women.
                Think big anyway.
People favor underdogs (meaning: a person who is at a disadvantage because of discrimination) but follow only top dogs (meaning: a person who is the boss, or has political power, or high social status).
                Fight for a few underdogs anyway.
What you spend years building may be destroyed overnight.
                Build anyway.
People really need help but may attack you if you do help them.
                Help them anyway.
Give the world the best you have and you will get kicked in the teeth.
                Give the world the best you have anyway.
 Do you agree? Share with us your rules for living a good life.

A summary of “Better ways to learn”

This is a summary of “Better ways to learn” written by Tara Parker-Pole on http://mobile.nytimes.com/blogs/well/2014/10/06/better-ways-to-learn/
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Better ways to learn” is a post to share innovative opinions about studying and provide all learners of all fields with some useful suggestions in learning so that their study will become more flexible and fascinating in a more essential and smarter manner.

According to Mr. Carey, it is very important for learners to understand how the brain processes, stores and retrieves information. It is old habits of most students to make ourselves sit on a chair for several hours to learn or get lazy in study and only cram when a test is coming. Actually, those are not completely bad ways of learning, but they do not bring effective results. Pushing yourselves four hours on learning may make you get bored and exhausted easily and cramming for any exam does not help you remember all what you have learnt in a long time. Therefore, to solve all those limitations in study, Mr. Carey recommends many better methods of learning such as:
  1. Changing learning environment frequently
Mr Carey says: “The brain wants variation. It wants to move, it wants to take periodic breaks.”
Therefore, learners can change learning environment by searching for new atmosphere that makes them feel more interested and passionate in learning.
  1. Discussing with teachers to exchange about the lesson
Our brain needs signaling all important information it need to store and the best way to keep your brain aware of key materials is to give it a chance to re-check all necessary information. Your learning will be reinforced if you frequently talk to teachers about the lessons or note down some main points of the lesson on flashcards.
  1. Trying a new technique called “distributed learning”, or spacing
Mr. Carey shows that learners would rather divide their time of study into small periods of time than concentrate on learning for just a definite amount of time at once time. And arranging a reasonable learning timetable is required based on each separate subject. However, for any tests, it is suggested by Mr. Carey that the optimal intervals is always needed. In his opinion, if learners have a test on Friday, Monday is a suitable time for studying and Thursday is a good choice for reviewing. Similarly, studying in one-week intervals is appropriate for those whose test is a month away.
  1. Offering yourselves enough sleep and taking advantages of your sleep
Mr Carey supposes that sleep is the finisher on learning because when sleeping, what you have learnt is processed, categorized and solidified by your brain. Concretely, retaining facts are conducted during the first half of the sleep cycle while math skills are retained during the second half. Then, students can use the above rule in their study. For instance, it is the best for a student with language test to study before going to bed and then review all they have learnt in the morning. And math students should review lesson before going to bed because the second half of sleep process will help them give information to their brain.
In general, “Better ways to learn” has helped readers have a more motivated thought in learning by emphasizing the importance of understanding how human’s brain works by learners and given learners some new ways in learning.
Do you agree or disagree with facts given in the post and do you have any more motivated methods of learning?

What makes people happy?

(excerpts from an article in AARP: The Magazine, February-March 2013, by Dan Buettner, author of The Blue Zones: Lessons for Living Longer From the People Who have Lived the Longest.)
  1. Get a Daily Dose of Friends
“A strong social network is foundational” says Jim Harter, PhD,   coauthor of Wellbeing: The Five Essential Elements. His research shows that America’s happiest people get at least six hours a day of interaction with friends or family.
  1. Find Your Soul mate
People in long term, committed relationships suffer less stress and live longer with fewer diseases. If you are in a long term relationship and you are happy, work hard to stay that way.
  1. Ignite your Passion for Compassion
Giving feels good, and several studies have shown that givers tend to be happier people.  Jorge Moll, M.D., PhD, head of the D’Or Institute for Research and Education in Brazil showed that altruism stimulates the same pleasure centers in the brain as sugar and cocaine do. No money to give away? Give your time by getting involved in service projects at your school or community.
 What works for you? Share your secret with us!
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Words
Meanings
Social network (n)network of social interactions and personal relationships.
Foundational (adj)Affecting or relating to the essential nature of something or the crucial point about an issue
Interaction (n)




a mutual or reciprocal action or influence.
Long term relationship (n)The way in which two or more people or things are connected, or the state of being connected for a long time
Ignite (v)Arouse or inflame (an emotion or situation)
Compassion (n)Sympathetic pity and concern for the sufferings or misfortunes of others:
Altruism (n)Disinterested and selfless concern for the well-being of others
Cocaine (n)Cocaine-Addiction1-1024x682

Pleasure centers of the brain (n)tải xuống (1)  Pleasure center lets us know when something is enjoyable and reinforces the desire for us to perform the same pleasurable action again. This is also called the reward circuit, which includes all kinds of pleasure, from laughter to certain types of drug use.